Someone is always tattling in our house. With six kids ranging from 17 down to 2, it’s practically our family soundtrack. At any given moment, someone is sprinting through the kitchen shouting, “Mooooom! Guess what he did!”
It got so bad that we finally had to install what we now call The Tattle Phone — an old-school rotary style phone that’s not plugged into a single thing. The kids can pick it up anytime they feel the need to “report a crime.” They dial, they rant, they hang up, and peace is restored (for at least 30 seconds).
But even with the Tattle Phone, we had to institute a new family rule:
“Are you tattling or telling?”
We want them to stop and think—is this about keeping someone safe, or just about getting your brother in trouble?
Because unless your sister is setting something on fire or your brother is in actual danger, you probably don’t need to tattle.
And then it hit me one day as I was sipping my “Women of God” tumbler and breaking up yet another toddler tribunal:
We grown-ups do the same thing.
We’ve just swapped the kitchen chaos for church gossip.
You know the kind:
“Bless her heart, but I heard Sister So-and-So let her kids dress up as demon hunters for Halloween. We need to pray for that family.”
Or the always-pious:
“Brother Whatshisface got written up at work again. I’m just telling you so you’ll know how to pray.”
Let’s be real, friends—Halloween costumes and job mistakes are not moral emergencies. They’re not hurting you, your family, or your witness. That’s just grown-up tattling with a Sunday-school spin.
Jesus actually gave us a better plan in Matthew 18:15:
“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone.”
Alone. Not to your small group, not to the church prayer chain, and definitely not to Facebook.
And Proverbs 16:28 reminds us:
“A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends.”
Then James 1:26 comes in swinging:
“If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue, his religion is worthless.”
Whew. That one stings a little.
The truth is, gossip is just tattling with better vocabulary. We point out someone else’s faults while ignoring the mess in our own hearts.
Matthew 7:3-5 reminds us that we’re not perfect either.
“Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.”
Geez! Maybe we should think before we share that “prayer request” about the prayers others might be sharing about us.
So maybe we all need a Tattle Phone. Next time you’re tempted to “share” that prayer request about Sister So-and-So’s questionable parenting or Brother Whatshisface’s work ethic, pick up your imaginary phone, vent to Jesus, and hang up.
He’s the only one who can actually fix it anyway.
As for me, I’m keeping my Tattle Phone on standby—because between six kids and my own tongue, I’m still working on my spiritual call log too.
Now if you’ll excuse me, someone’s reporting a serious offense involving a Nutella pack.
And apparently, justice must be served.
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